[ Yeah. In fact, this reminds me effects are still happening, and as they're fighting these mooks, there is suddenly a random, succinct thought:
"Abominations." ]
Over time. As one becomes older, the burden of memories becomes a shackle, and then a trigger into a transformation.
[ The 'mara-struck process' can, in fact, be considered a very cursed breakdown. Literally. ]
Though, there are some who can become artificially mara-struck, even if they are short-lived species, or if they are exposed to tainted material...unintentionally or on purpose.
[ Yeah, she's with him on calling these abominations. They have similar things in her world too, after all. If anything, it would makes her cut them down even more. ]
... I suppose the wisdom of long-living species or whatever they had was something that the short-lived species wanted?
...For some short-lived species, yes. But there were some long-lived species who thought they were doing a favor in forcing others to experience what they did.
Long-lived individuals who lived many years, but did not wish to die. Individuals of a certain cult, who preached such a state as something great, and profound. Rantings of delusional beings.
[ Something like dark amusement then can be felt, but a definite feeling of hatred towards these beings. However...
The earlier weeks... Were you really that bad on the first week? I can understand not knowing everything and being sour that you were suddenly kidnapped here, but...
[ Two entire friends, Blade!! And the focus is understandable. ]
... I can understand that.
[ Despite being in the simulation room, the two get pulled into a memshare void. Here, Blade will witness something from Gregor's POV. Enjoy!! It lasts until 1:53:15. ]
[ No. He will say any friends he has made are "extremely close allies". He doesn't make friends!!!!
Anyway...thanks, for the sudden horrid memshare.
He hadn't anticipated bearing witness to any of this. No...not a single bit. Even worse still when the monster acts as Yuri, and it's twisted. Enough to make him feel revolted; a feeling he thought he no longer had any concept of its feeling due to its intensity.
When it's over, he realizes he's in something like a cold sweat. But, Yuri is in front of him. At least he can recognize a memory when it comes before him. Though, he isn't allowed the luxury of saying anything.
No. Even as Yuri's name falls from his lips...it all begins anew. ]
2/2 cw: suicidal ideation, violence, torture, death
[ Ruthlessly a memory is thrown upon Yuri, all the same.
'A man treks onwards and onwards in a place he recognizes little. He does not recall his name. How could he?
There is little that he does remember.
But, it matters little. There is someone standing before this man. A woman with hair white as snow, in certain attire, staring with red eyes that bore a certain madness.
Then, pain.
She stabbed the man relentlessly, until crimson filled his sight and iron spilled from every point slashed inside of him, and exited his throat. Darkness slid over his sight, and his body ceased to respond. But, it only lasted for a moment.
When light returned, he was good as new, but the shock of death shakes through the man's entire being. The woman coldly asks, "Do you remember?"
He tries to respond, barely able to put together any words. It's impossible. She stabs right through him. His stomach, his chest, his hands, his legs. Thousand upon thousand of times.
Each time, his body regenerated, leaving behind phantom (pains) sensations that lingered, but could be recalled at a simple touch upon his body. He doesn't remember how many times; it feels as if it goes on for an eternity. His mind is blank, his will to live already having dissipated, but he doesn't remember when. Finally, when she tries to pierce him with the sword on one other occasion, he grabs it with his bare hands.
The woman asks coldly, "Do you remember now?"
The man's mind is empty. Mechanically, he feels himself meet those crimson eyes, which stare into his own, saying nothing. She then runs him through with the blade again.
The feeling of pain becomes a constant companion. He yearns for death. For that brief moment of peace from it all.
"Remember the feeling of death, and bring it to them."
He doesn't remember. How many more times it was. But, he sees that crimson in his vision again, sees the blade that killed him lying broken in half on the ground.
"Rise, and let me kill you once more."'
And then, just like that, the mutual memory share is over. Blade can only stare for a moment, wordlessly at her. ]
[ Imagine watching death memories back to back. Yuri stares at the space where the memory was, watching Blade get stabbed and dying so many times. She thought Blade wanting to die was mostly tied to his seemingly immortal life, so watching this changes a lot of things. People would normally not stay sane after a torture session like that—all those painful deaths...
The void spits them out back into the simulation room. ]
[ The rabbit hole seems to go even deeper; it isn't exactly something Blade feels that is the worst for anyone to know because witnessing such brutality seems as if an event most are used to by now.
But, if he had a choice in ensuring it wasn't shown...still, it's this question that makes him give pause. ]
Yes. However, I am used to it by now...
[ Living in pain, that is. What Jingliu did to him is something that can't be taken back. ]
It seems I had also witnessed that end — what you had described before. It's even more revolting witnessing it as if I were there. From Gregor's memories, I presume, due to you seeing it from his perspective previously.
[ Yuri would be exactly right on the money here (you know it's bad when the mun can't even like, softball things, haha.) ]
...For events such as these, it is far more easier to stomach hearing it, than to be a witness.
[ Blade thinks an Aeon should just wipe these bastards out, but the universal logistics of that is probably too much even for a being like that (to say less of the potential ramifications!) ]
Yuri, do you have any idea of what your future direction will be, after all of this?
[ Not just "survive" or "live", though both aren't bad and not unreasonable for her, he thinks. ]
[ Yuri smiles a little. She still wishes for Blade to be able to pick and choose how he would be able to die. Despite the pain, she hopes that he can go peacefully... whenever his time will come. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
And how does it happen?
[ Do they need a mental breakdown? Because that's like... normal. ]
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"Abominations." ]
Over time. As one becomes older, the burden of memories becomes a shackle, and then a trigger into a transformation.
[ The 'mara-struck process' can, in fact, be considered a very cursed breakdown. Literally. ]
Though, there are some who can become artificially mara-struck, even if they are short-lived species, or if they are exposed to tainted material...unintentionally or on purpose.
no subject
... I suppose the wisdom of long-living species or whatever they had was something that the short-lived species wanted?
[ That's how it usually goes, she thinks. ]
no subject
...For some short-lived species, yes. But there were some long-lived species who thought they were doing a favor in forcing others to experience what they did.
Long-lived individuals who lived many years, but did not wish to die. Individuals of a certain cult, who preached such a state as something great, and profound. Rantings of delusional beings.
[ Something like dark amusement then can be felt, but a definite feeling of hatred towards these beings. However...
...there's also him... ]
no subject
... That sounds rather egotistical. People can go plenty insane without their interference.
[ lmao ]
Blade, your hatred is leaking very blatantly.
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Blade stares for a moment, wondering what she could possibly mean as they've mowed down a good number of these gnats...
Then, he realizes, with a — well, it's not a frown. But, a thoughtful expression. Of some kind. ]
That they can. Though the those so-called 'Disciples' could care less.
[ ... ]
I suppose it is like how it was in the earlier weeks, then.
no subject
[ Blade, please. ]
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I was always this 'bad', as you say. None of you were simply able to perceive it or were fortunate not to catch wind of such things.
Not a single one.
[ Only two more now as he slashes down the enemies mercilessly. They're not so dissimilar from one another. Not at all. ]
no subject
... Did you want someone to notice?
no subject
Earlier on, I did.
[ For the usual standard Blade-type reason, so you know. He takes care of the other one just the same. ]
Now, I believe it's perhaps better that they didn't.
no subject
[ Mara-infestation all clear! Yuri can now pay attention to Blade some more. ]
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[ He can say this now because he wouldn't at the moment. Well. Maybe jury is out on the former. ]
no subject
[ Perhaps friendship is magic, after all. ]
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Saying he made at least two friends is enough to end him. ]
...Considering the circumstances, we share the same sentiment.
Besides, I would like to keep the focus of any hatred or aggression solely for our enemy right now.
[ "It is the only barrier still standing in front of what I wish to achieve." A common sentiment by some, in certain respects, perhaps. ]
no subject
... I can understand that.
[ Despite being in the simulation room, the two get pulled into a memshare void. Here, Blade will witness something from Gregor's POV. Enjoy!! It lasts until 1:53:15. ]
1/2
Anyway...thanks, for the sudden horrid memshare.
He hadn't anticipated bearing witness to any of this. No...not a single bit. Even worse still when the monster acts as Yuri, and it's twisted. Enough to make him feel revolted; a feeling he thought he no longer had any concept of its feeling due to its intensity.
When it's over, he realizes he's in something like a cold sweat. But, Yuri is in front of him. At least he can recognize a memory when it comes before him. Though, he isn't allowed the luxury of saying anything.
No. Even as Yuri's name falls from his lips...it all begins anew. ]
2/2 cw: suicidal ideation, violence, torture, death
'A man treks onwards and onwards in a place he recognizes little. He does not recall his name. How could he?
There is little that he does remember.
But, it matters little. There is someone standing before this man. A woman with hair white as snow, in certain attire, staring with red eyes that bore a certain madness.
Then, pain.
She stabbed the man relentlessly, until crimson filled his sight and iron spilled from every point slashed inside of him, and exited his throat. Darkness slid over his sight, and his body ceased to respond. But, it only lasted for a moment.
When light returned, he was good as new, but the shock of death shakes through the man's entire being. The woman coldly asks, "Do you remember?"
He tries to respond, barely able to put together any words. It's impossible. She stabs right through him. His stomach, his chest, his hands, his legs. Thousand upon thousand of times.
Each time, his body regenerated, leaving behind phantom (pains) sensations that lingered, but could be recalled at a simple touch upon his body. He doesn't remember how many times; it feels as if it goes on for an eternity. His mind is blank, his will to live already having dissipated, but he doesn't remember when. Finally, when she tries to pierce him with the sword on one other occasion, he grabs it with his bare hands.
The woman asks coldly, "Do you remember now?"
The man's mind is empty. Mechanically, he feels himself meet those crimson eyes, which stare into his own, saying nothing. She then runs him through with the blade again.
The feeling of pain becomes a constant companion. He yearns for death. For that brief moment of peace from it all.
"Remember the feeling of death, and bring it to them."
He doesn't remember. How many more times it was. But, he sees that crimson in his vision again, sees the blade that killed him lying broken in half on the ground.
"Rise, and let me kill you once more."'
And then, just like that, the mutual memory share is over. Blade can only stare for a moment, wordlessly at her. ]
no subject
The void spits them out back into the simulation room. ]
... Does it still hurt?
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But, if he had a choice in ensuring it wasn't shown...still, it's this question that makes him give pause. ]
Yes. However, I am used to it by now...
[ Living in pain, that is. What Jingliu did to him is something that can't be taken back. ]
It seems I had also witnessed that end — what you had described before. It's even more revolting witnessing it as if I were there. From Gregor's memories, I presume, due to you seeing it from his perspective previously.
no subject
[ She lowers her hands, hooking her own fingers together. Yuri wonders if his pain is continuous, like chronic pain but worse and phantom. ]
It wasn't as much of a surprise since I heard about it before, but I truly... underestimated how bad it could get even after my death.
no subject
...For events such as these, it is far more easier to stomach hearing it, than to be a witness.
[ Blade thinks an Aeon should just wipe these bastards out, but the universal logistics of that is probably too much even for a being like that (to say less of the potential ramifications!) ]
Yuri, do you have any idea of what your future direction will be, after all of this?
[ Not just "survive" or "live", though both aren't bad and not unreasonable for her, he thinks. ]
no subject
[ Imagine Aeons just crashing into Limbus world. There would be so many Consequences. ]
But I will hopefully be able to live without wondering if I'll die at any time in the day.
no subject
...I would prefer that to be the case.
[ Her living without worries about dying horribly is, perhaps, one of the best outcomes out of all this. ]
no subject
Thank you, Blade.